Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Canadian inventiveness and what it means

SO we(Canadians) have invented the following and many more: Insulin, the telephone, the light bulb, the Canada arm (used by NASA), wonder bra, standard time, hockey, basketball, lacrosse, the zipper, the Robertson screw ( and yes it kicks ass on the Philips people), ski doo, blackberry,walkie talkie, instant replay, hockey, lacrosse, basketball, self propelled combine, plexi glass... the list goes on and on. Now the reason that I am writing about this, is I was having thoughts back to my days at Calvin College and the constant questions that came up in the debate between Canada and the states was always what has Canada done for the states, beside suckle at the mother teat. Well if you are able to read and have some sort of educational background (grade 3 will do) then you can clearly see that some of the greatest and most cultural changing inventions have come from our great nation. Now I am not saying that the U.S has not held up its end of the bargain by any means, their list is very extensive as well.

I only wish to point out that we have, and continue to contribute to our society and are not just suckling at the mother teat, while going by the name of "America Lite". That is not only an insult in that we are our own country (who relies on the states yes) but more so that "America lite" is clearly making reference to Miller lite beer... I shouldn't have to say this, but as a country who prides itself on the fact that we can drink like no other, while not drinking horse piss (American beer) we take extreme offense to being compared to a beer that is not only considered to be shit here, but it is also shit in the states.

So to end I will say that I love the states and most things about it, but I also love my home country of Canada and most things here as well. But I really REALLY get sick of being compared to a shit beer and being swept aside as though we dont contribute to the world like the states do. So say what you want but there you have it!!

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Still waiting... All the while noticing...

So we are still waiting for the arrival of our little one, and people are starting to ask when we are going to get induced and all that jazz, well we are still 11 days away so I am thinking that it is not going to be anytime soon. So while I have been waiting for this event to take place, I have been really aware of other parents, kids and things in general that pertains to raising children. It was during this last week that I heard a 911 call on the radio (Jim Rome show) that stuck with me and struck me as funny, sorry, REALLY FUNNY and yet sad (somewhat) at the same time, here it goes

A woman called 911 when she arrived home one day to find her 12 year old and 10 year old fighting, not just any fighting, but really going at it a la Layla Ali in the ring. So she comes home and immediately calls 911 to request some help/backup. She is talking with the man on the other end and tells him that her 12 year old has kicked a hole in the wall and they are still fighting uncontrollably. This is where it gets funny, or at least to me it does. The dispatcher then calmly and matter of fact states "OK, do you want us to come over and shoot her?" this is followed by and extremely awkward pause on the mothers end, which is ended when she completely berates him and ask him for his name and tells him that this is not funny, blah blah blah. Now for those of you who think that I am sick for thinking that this is freakin' hilarious hear me out and then judge away.

First of all this mother of two young girls is not able to control her our daughters and has to call 911 for help, when she calls the dispatcher sees it how I see it "What the hell does this woman expect from me, parenting lessons???" and thus replies with one of the funniest and wittiest line in the history of 911 calls. "Do you want us to shoot her?" HILARIOUS!!! If you cant see the humor and brilliance in that then I suggest you re-read this until you find it funny, or better yet find the sound byte and listen to it. The reason why i find it sad, is that this mother can not control two little girls, 10 and 12 years of age, yet when she hears the mockery in the dispatchers response she goes on full attack and gives it to him. If she was able to handle her own kids the way that she handled the "shoot her" comment I am sure this call would have never been placed in the first place. Honestly what did this woman expect from this poor guy. it is called 911 emergency for a reason, it isn't called 911 super nanny, 911 parenting hot line, or best of all 911 Dr. Phil. If you need to call the emergency number of 911 for a sibling fight, well then in my opinion that speaks volumes to your parenting skills.

Before you all jump on me about the fact that I don't have kids, and you just wait and see, and kids aren't as easy as they look... Tell me this have any of you ever EVER called 911 because your kids were having a fight? I think not. So in the end the hilarity of the call and situation completely overrides the sad parenting skills part, which just leaves this "OK, do you want us to come over and shoot her?"

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Final Weeks for to milestones

Here I am, entering into the final weeks of the pregnancy. There still is a lot to do and we don't have a crib, but I have been told by many that a dresser drawer will suffice just fine when it comes to the nocturnal habits of this baby species that we are about to have enter into this world. So the room is almost done except for the fact that I have to put up some trim, paint the top color, put up the crib (whenever E-children decides we are ready to have it), put the car seat in the car, pack a bag, have my final "Holy shit I am gonna be a dad" moment and finally put plastic sheets on our bed... just kidding about the last part. So really all in all we fell unprepared and kind of betrayed by our friends, all of whom told us, that 6 months would be plenty of time and how we would be ready when the time comes. So to all you back stabbers... THANKS!! Seriously though, I do feel somewhat ready and prepared, or as ready and prepared as I can be. I am very excited and just ready to meet the little guy/girl and see what He/She looks like and decide on a name, but more to the point, I am excited that when the baby is born, I get to break my vow of dry living and drink a beautiful little pinot noir that I picked up the other day. Having not had the taste of alcohol for the past 4 weeks has been surprisingly easy, I found it harder to give up coffee for a month than I have not drinking alcohol for the past month. I guess there are two ways to look at this, one is glad to know that I am not an alcoholic or have alcoholic tendencies, and then other is that it sucks to be the place where I usually buy my booze as business must have suffered.

So dear readers I come to you on this fine Saturday morning, a morning in which most of the snow here is melted as a result of our 14ºC/57ºF day yesterday, looking forward to two things that are nearing on my horizon. The upcoming birth of my first child and the upcoming "first" sip of fine wine with "da wife" after 6 weeks for me and a long 9 months for her. I have yet to decide which will be more monumental... NOT!! (little tribute to Borat there folks) For those of you out there please pray that we are blessed with a healthy child and that momma will do well. Thanks and CIAO for now!!

Friday, February 1, 2008

Funniest family guy clip ever

I am posting this because I have been a bit addicted to Family guy as of late and thought that you should all take a look at this clip.

If any of you watch "family Guy" then you have already seen this, but for those of you who haven't, well this makes me laugh every time I see it. freakin' hilarious!